“Push The Button” #PTBBook — How Can I Buy the Book?

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Thank you all SO much for the initial support of my first novel, Push The Button. I have been overwhelmed by the love shown to my “baby”.

I have some updates on ordering for you!

First, you can order your hardcopy 1 of 2 ways:

1. Direct from the printer, Create Space, here. This copy will ship directly. You’ll pay them for shipping and handling and not have to wait for my shipping. Only downside is that you won’t be able to have it signed by me.

2. Direct from me! You can still order your copy directly from me and since I stand to make more money this way, I will sign ALL copies of #PTBBook ordered from me.

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Second, you can instantly download your digital copy 1of 3 ways:

1. You can download directly here and have your copy in minutes.

2. You can order from me, here, and you will receive a personalized email from me with your book file, within 1-2 days.

3. You can buy it from Amazon and have it sent immediately to your Kindle (and if you have Kindle Unlimited, it is FREE).

If you’re interested in bulk sales, I have some fantastic offers for you. Learn more about how you can save when you spend $50 or moe or $100 or more.

Finally, if you’re an independent bookseller and want to work out a consignment arrangement, please email me (info@feministajones.com) for more information.

XOXO,

FJLOGO1

 

What Kids Think About Police Brutality

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Over the past few months (years, really), we’ve learned of several incidences of unarmed Black Americans being killed by police officers. They were shot, choked, slammed to the ground, etc. In some cases, the police have been indicted with charges related to their deaths, others have not. Some have gone to trial, some have not. Have any been found guilty? My having to ask that speaks to how rare it is for a police officer to be held accountable for killing an unarmed Black person in America.

Officers Wilson, Pantaleo, and Weekley recently evaded justice by either escaping indictment or having charges against them dropped.

The families of Michael Brown, Eric Garner, and Aiyana Stanley-Jones will have no resolution, no justice for the loss of the lives of the people they loved the most.

It took a second grand jury to indict Officer Kendrick, who took the life of Jonathan Ferrell. It took almost two years to indict Officer Servin for destroying Rekia Boyd’s family. The families of Miriam Carey and Ramarley Graham are just… hopeless, left wondering “Why?”

I recently participated in two protests in NYC following the news that a Staten Island Grand Jury decided against indicting Officer Pantaleo, who was seen on camera choking Eric Garner to death.

Today, I had a conversation with my son explaining what mommy was doing and why he had to spend those evenings with his daddy. I told him it wasn’t safe for him to be out there and we talked about my friends who were arrested, what it means to protest, and why it’s important. We talked about Aiyana and Eric.

The following is a recording of the latter part of our conversation. I decided to record it because I could hear my 8 year-old son growing more passionate and angry and I thought it would be worth it to document.

You see, it isn’t that my son represents how all children think about police brutality. It is more about the need to have these kinds of conversations with our children. We need to open up and create safe spaces for children to ask questions and to also learn age-appropriate truths about the world around them. You have to know your kid and I know mine is very much interested in the well-being of others.

Listen here.

 

“This Is Not How Your Story Ends” – A Letter to My Younger Self

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The following is a guest blog. I welcome submissions, as I love featuring different voices in this space. If interested in being featured as a guest blogger, email me info@feministajones.com

Reflection is one of the most important parts of the growth process. We have to examine where we’ve been to have any idea of where we might go, and because hindsight is 20/20, it’s easy to look back at your former self and offer insight.

In 2011, I compiled a book of letters from alumnae of Florida A&M University to their freshman year selves. The project ultimately included over twenty letters from girls of varying socioeconomic backgrounds, life stories, and perspectives. The only regret I had about the project was that I didn’t offer my own.

What would I tell the self I was at eighteen? What could I say to me in 2001? And since it is impossible to turn back the hands of time, how could I structure my writing so that someone else might glean something valuable from my experience?

From that moment comes this piece, a letter written to the naïve, ambitious, unfocused, and determined self I was when I stepped on the highest of seven hills. It’s a look back at that girl, the one with the wild hair, face free of makeup, high school letterman jacket, and bubbly personality. This is for her, but it’s for you, too, my reader. I hope in my words a struggling freshman might find hope, a lost sophomore might find inspiration, an unfocused junior might find her place, a confused senior might find clarity, and an alumnus might find just a little bit of her or himself reflected in my words.

Though my experience is my own, I do believe I share it with so many other young men and women who have a taken a chance on using college to change the course of their lives.

Here’s my story. What’s yours?

 

20 November 2014

To my Dreezy baby,

 

Girl. Girlgirlgirlgirlgirlgirl.

Are you listening? You never listen to anyone, about anything, ever, but I need you to listen to me right now. You are smart. We both know this, but also know this: your intellect will not be enough to get you to graduation. Matter of fact, all of your “smarts” will eventually get you kicked out of school. Yes, you, the brilliant, all-knowing, gifted, genius child will be on academic suspension and have your financial aid rescinded, which means you won’t be able to enroll in classes, which means you’ll watch your friends go to class and graduate while you sit on the sidelines. And I’ll tell you the truth; you’re going to give up. You might not give up on your life, but you will give up on your goals and take on others that were never intended for you to fulfill.

But that won’t be the end of your story.

You’ll spend three years out of school, working for a little over minimum wage, and for a while, you won’t even be focused on returning to FAM. You’ll even lie to friends and tell them that you’re happy being out of school, happy working at your job, happy not doing what God purposed for you to do. You’ll spend time ignoring God’s plan because you just can’t see how it’s going to work. You’ll eventually forget that you were called to FAM according to God’s purpose working within you. You’ll forget because it’s easier to forget than to be a failure. Working will satisfy the part of you that’s focused on achievement. Working will pay the bills, but it won’t fill your heart with joy. You’ll always know, deep in the recesses of your heart, that you’re out of line with the master plan.

But that also won’t be the end of your story.

It’ll take a car accident (head-on collision at 3:30 in the morning) to get you back on the path to college graduation. It’ll take planning and prayer, promises and pleading, to get you enrolled in classes, forgiven of your debt (Yeah, you’ll owe FAMU about $2700), and re-awarded financial aid. You will have to go from office to office, even to the Leon County Clerk of Courts office, but in that moment you will learn how to work for your education and stop waiting for everything to be given to you, and this is a lesson you’ve needed to learn for a long time. Being the smartest girl in the class doesn’t matter if you can’t take classes. Running around the city of Tallahassee looking for former professors will be what you need to finally understand the value of an education and how precious of a gift it is. When you return to the university, you will embody excellence with caring.

But that also won’t be the end of your story.

All told, you’ll change your major to English (where you probably should have been all along), graduate with honors (raising your GPA from a 1.6 to a 3.17), go on to earn a master’s degree in Secondary Education with a concentration in English (3.84 G.P.A.!!!!!), and then apply and be accepted into a PhD program (where you’ll complete all of your coursework with straight As). So you see, everything that will happen to you happened for a reason because the question wasn’t whether or not you could do the work; the question was actually whether or not you were ready to do the work. Every person you thought was working against you was actually a part of the plan for your good, but you wouldn’t believe me if you hadn’t experienced it. You needed every disappointment, every failure, every tear, every long night, and every early morning. You needed to feel the sting of failure because it made the smell of success even sweeter. You needed the confusion in your life because it would ultimately lead to clarity of your purpose. You, the girl who never needed anybody or anything, will find that you need so much and so many people. You aren’t an island, little girl.

I’m sure you’re surprised by all that I’ve said, but remember this, my beautiful Black girl, you wouldn’t be the person you are today if you had not been the person you were yesterday. You wouldn’t have met the people you would one day meet if you hadn’t been a student at FAM three years after you should have graduated. You wouldn’t have traveled the places you’ve traveled, or even loved the people you’ve loved. I’m actually not quite sure where you would be—or what you would be doing—if college had been smooth sailing from the beginning to the end, but I do know this: you are wiser for the journey you traveled. Now, when you speak, you have authority in your voice. When you reflect, you have wisdom in your eyes. When you counsel, you have experience in your arsenal.

As I close this letter of reflection, I remind you again to trust the process, for the plan for your life is much bigger than you can see.

I love you like you are myself,

Rondrea Danielle

Sidebar: One day, you’re going to wake up, and you’ll have everything you’ve ever dreamed of. And you’ll have earned it. I’m so very proud of you.

 

Rondrea Danielle Mathis—a native of Miami, Florida—holds a bachelor’s degree in English literature (2008) and a master’s degree in Secondary Education with a concentration in English (2010). Currently, Rondrea is ABD at the University of South Florida, where she is pursuing a Ph.D. in English, and a college instructor, teaching composition and literature courses. Additionally, Rondrea is a minister at Heritage Christian Community Baptist Church, vice president of the Tampa Chapter of the FAMU National Alumni Association, and advisor to the USF Section of the National Council of Negro Women. She can be reached on Twitter at @iRondrea.

 

 

The #AntiFeministChecklist

On November 11, 2014, I posted a piece on Black Male Privilege and (shocker!) there was backlash. Most of the people responding didn’t read it and that is fine; I expect people to be intentionally obtuse and perpetually dense.

I received a lot of really ridiculous responses, so I decided to compile a list. I called on my followers to submit the responses, rebuttals, etc. to their feminist leanings. I wanted to know the kinds of things people hear when they openly identify as feminists and when they share their feminist ideas.

I provided this as an example:

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“Feminists just go too far, they don’t want equality, but rather to reverse the old gender roles. They would rather prefer an all out genocide on the male population or in less extreme case, believe they should be treated as queens everywhere they go. ”

 

“If women want to ‘Free the nipple’, we should be able to free the balls.”

 

“You can’t be a feminist. You like red lipstick and have curves. Ugly chicks need to fight that fight.”

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“Feminism is stupid. More men are raped every year compared to women, look it up.”

 

“Feminists reject logic and reason. There is logically only one way to make them stop, to dismantle and eliminate them.”

 

“They’re the greatest threat to gender equality and need to be eradicated. If you disagree then you have false hope.”

 

“Girls can like taller guys, but we can’t like thin girls.”

 

“How come when we don’t get up for you on the bus we’re assholes but when Rosa Parks doesn’t move its a movement?”

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“Women are a protected species in our culture. If a women gets assaulted by a male in public, every guy protects her. If a male gets assaulted by a woman, people usually laugh.”

 

“Men are just biologically superior. You can’t argue with science.”

 

“If you get to call us anti-choice, do we get to call you pro-abortion?”

 

“Because of feminism, women who are convicted of sexual assault do not get the same treatment that males get.”

 

“Divorce courts are swayed in the favor of women.”

 

“Bitch.”

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“Why don’t men get birth control? Feminism is stupid, girls are selfish.”

 

“It’s okay for women to call meninism a joke but we can’t call feminism a joke?”

 

“I have to make 6 figures, have 6 abs, have nice cars, a house, buy you stuff, listen to you, but it’s still bad to ask for a sandwich?”

 

“Girls can breastfeed in public, but I can’t masturbate in public?”

 

“Women don’t need equal pay because they’ll get husbands.”

 

“I’m gonna rape/murder you, you fucking cunt”

 

“You call yourself a feminist but you shave your armpits?”

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“If you’re a feminist, why do you try to look feminine?”

 

“If you don’t want to cook and clean then who is going to pay for the personal chefs/takeout and maids? Me? You’re enforcing gender roles.”

 

“Us men should also get a week out every month to complain and be taken care of, like girls do on their period.”

 

“Most, if not all feminists are die-hard advocates of abortion. Therefore, feminism is a disgusting, dehumanizing movement.”

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“New feminism is wrong. There are so many jobs that should be strictly gender based. Would you want a man to be a gynecologist?”

 

“There’s no such thing as male privilege.”

 

“Feminism is supported by the rape industry. Women get wimpy jail sentences for the same crime that a man commits.”

 

“Feminism is another form of segregation within our society. It creates division by throwing pity on a group who some people deem ‘weaker’.”

 

“Feminism is just women rebelling against their roles in nature.”

 

“Women don’t get equal pay because they take maternity leave.”

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“Women have more power than men because they control sex.”

 

“Women are oppressed because they allow men to oppress them.”

 

“You see misogyny everywhere because you have chronic anxiety. You get what you expect”

“Feminism is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children (abortions), destroy capitalism, and become more like men, or even lesbians.”

 

“Men are the ones who actually lack protection in society, we do the most dangerous jobs, have a higher suicide rate and die in wars… so women are the privileged ones”

 

“A man being sexually ignored by women is at the bottom of the social pyramid, because he is being denied manhood and status that only women can confer. This shows that women hold all the power”
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“The word ‘creep’ is a gendered slur against men who are deemed not attractive enough to approach women without censure. It is offensive to call a man a creep or accuse him of harassment, because that is gender discrimination against me.”

 

“The wage gap is a myth”

 

“New feminism is wrong. It’s a man’s job to protect his family and country. When you take away the duties like this by allowing women into certain fields like military special forces, you take away chivalry.”

 

“If feminists really wanted equality, they wouldn’t let me pay for them on dates”

“Before civilization all sex was rape, so rape is our evolutionary destiny.  Trying to deny it just makes men angrier.”
And of course

“Feminism doesn’t make women truly happy”

Thank you all for your submissions. If you have more you’d like to add, feel free to do so in the comment section. I’m sure this will be an oft-updated post, as the nonsense continues to pour forth.

Special thanks to @emilylouize @miyakalee @JessicaGoldstei @theripeness @jenninmotion @corgisaurus and several others who helped out with this list.

Push The Button Hardcopies Now Available!! #PTBBook

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Due to popular demand, hardcopies of Push The Button are now available!!

You can pre-order your copy and save $2 off list price ($8) AND have it signed by ME!! (Use code: PrePTB when checking out)

All pre-orders will be shipped by December 10, just in time for the holidays. To ensure guaranteed shipping by 12.10, you *must* order your copy by 11/30/14. All orders placed after that will be regular price ($10) and will be shipping as ordered. Shipping is done two times per week, so allow 7-14 days for shipping and handling from New York, NY (longer if an international order).

Click HERE to order your copy today!!!

 

XOXO,

FJLOGO1

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